Wednesday, June 2, 2010

PYHO: Cancer scares the heck out of me


Cancer. It seriously scares me. I'm sure it scares everyone. But it REALLY scares me.

A couple of weeks ago, my best friend from college called me. We were having a normal catch-up kind of conversation when he drops this on me:

Him: "We got some bad news this week." Very matter of fact like.

Me: "What's going on?" With a hint of fear in my voice

Him: "My wife has breast cancer."

Me: "Wait. What? I don't think I heard that right." Kids screaming in the background. Did he really say what I thought he said?

Him "Jen. Has. Breast. Cancer. She found a lump a couple of weeks ago. Turns out it is malignant."

She is 32 years old. I thought this was a concern for older women. Not women the same age as me.

During her lumpectomy last week, they discovered that the cancer had spread to her lymph nodes. That means she will have to do chemo and radiation.

As soon as I heard all this, I immediately internalized it. I feel so badly that my friend and his wife are going through this, but all I could think about was, What if this was me? Mother of a three year old and 10 month old. How would Mr. Rose and I deal with me being a cancer patient. What if I succumbed to this disease and left my children motherless? I don't want my children to grow up without me.

Cancer scares the H E Double Hockey Sticks out of me. What scares you?

Go check out more Pour Your Heart Out posts over at Things I Can't Say.

10 comments:

Di said...

Currently - my first pregnancy is scaring the crap out of me. But cancer is up there. Along with the occluded carotid artery my dad has.

Shell said...

Sending prayers for her.

I'm so scared of cancer. Of getting sick. Anything serious illness taking me or my husband or one of my kids.

♥Cari♥ said...

Aww I'm so sorry for your friends! That's terrible! (((HUGS)))

Jeannie, Jane, Angel, Mommy, etc.. said...

I am so sorry to hear about your friend. I am right there with you though. Cancer scares the heck out of me too.

Jenn said...

Cancer scares me too. I used to think it was a disease for people older than me and that, by the time it could possibly affect me, there would be a cure. Wow. Losing loved ones also terrifies me. It's happened to much in my life already, and I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Sigh.

Marketing Mama said...

I'm with you chica. It scares the hell out of me. Everyone is affected by it in some way. Everyone.

So sorry to hear about your friend's wife.

blueviolet said...

I'm pretty sure that's the thing that scares me the most too. My mom survived breast cancer, my dad survived prostate cancer, but still...it terrifies me.

Kmama said...

The word cancer makes me want to crawl up into the fetal position. Many prayers for your friend's wife and their family!

purseblogger said...

Cancer scares the crap out of me too. It is so evil. My heart breaks for your friends. I pray she beats this.

J. L. W. said...

This is one of my worst fears. I lost my dad when I was 13 to cancer. I never want my children to go through that. I hope your friend's wife is okay and that she beats it.