PYHO: I never thought it would happen to me

When I first found out I was pregnant with Miss H, I poured over "What to Expect" type books about being pregnanct. I wanted to know every step of the way what was normal and healthy. Was I gaining the right amount of weight? What did those twinges mean?


Over the course of the next few months, I would have a routine pregnancy. I had all the normal pregnancy symptoms: mild to moderate morning sickness, cravings and food aversions, intense sense of smell. I lost a little weight at first and then started gaining as I was supposed to be.

At the time, I was driving 75 miles one way to work to a job that I loved. As my pregnancy progressed, I began to worry about the driving back and forth. My back was killing me from sitting so much (and from being pregnant!), so I managed to work a couple of days from home. Finally, I told my boss that I would be resigning at the end of my 28th week. I could not risk going into labor on the drive on my way home, or in the city I worked in which was over an hour away from where Mr. Rose worked.

After I stopped working, I filled my days with watching "A Baby Story" on TLC and what seemed like incessant cleaning. Mr. Rose would come home from work and find all the cabinets organized. I think he even said something along the lines of, "Are you nesting or something?" Who me? I'm only 32 weeks pregnant! This is not nesting. Nesting comes at the end.

Ahem.

A few days later, I headed to my 32-week prenatal appointment. There was an unusually long wait that day, and I remember being irritated that things were so behind. When I was finally called back, my blood pressure registered 135/100 (I actually have that number committed to memory.) My normal blood pressure is 100/70. The midwife who met with me for that appointment noticed my increased blood pressure and sudden weight gain of 15 lbs in four weeks and looked at me with concern. She told me to take it easy and to come back in two weeks instead of four.

Oh, how I wish I could relive that appointment! How I yearn to remember to tell her how badly my back was hurting! How much do I want to go back to that exam room and beg her to check my cervix for dilation.

Hindsight is 20/20 friends.

After that appointment, I went to the grocery store. I drove home, unpacked the groceries, and made a snack. I laid on the couch for awhile before I went to meet Mr. Rose at our childbirth preparation class.

And that is where my water broke. Right in the middle of practicing our relaxation techniques, I felt liquid running down my legs.

At 32 weeks and 4 days, I was admitted to labor and delivery with preterm rupture of membranes. I measured 2 cm dilated and was told that I was not having contractions. The doctors decided to monitor me overnight and then keep me in the hospital until my baby was born which they told me would be no longer than two weeks.

I lay on the examination table and tears ran down my cheeks. I was not prepared for this. At all. We didn’t have a car seat yet. We didn’t even have her name picked out.

We called our families. Everyone sounded concerned. We were concerned. Neither of us knew what was happening, why this was happening, or how this had happened. We were going to have a preemie.

The next morning after being told all night long that I was NOT having contractions, I demanded to be checked by a doctor. One peek under the sheet and that doctor said, “Yup, there’s the head.”

A few minutes later Miss H entered the world as a big 4lb-13oz 32-week preemie. She was wisked off to the NICU. My first day as a mother, and I had not just become a mommy. I had become a NICU Mommy. I never thought it could happen to me.

{In case you were wondering, the low back pain I had been experiencing for weeks before my water broke was actually preterm labor. The increased blood pressure and sudden weight gain all should have been red flags. In my opinion, I probably should have been on bed rest, but failed to mention all of my concerns to my health care provider. Next week, I will write more about my adventure as a NICU Mommy.}

 
Today I am linking up with Shell at Things I Can't Say for her Pour Your Heart Out meme. This is the one year anniversary of PYHO and she has some great gifts to give away for anyone who links up a PYHO post by tomorrow night. I personally love this meme because Shell is an amazing hostess and I always find some inspiring posts and fabulous new bloggers to follow from it. Head on over there and check it out!