Being brave at BlissDom

Last week, I leapt out of my comfort zone and headed to my first blogging conference, BlissDom 2011, in Nashville. As I mentioned in my pre-conference post, I was terrified. Thankfully, I had some great friends step up and hold my hand help me have a great time. Here's how it all went down.

I got off the airplane in Nashville feeling alone, inadequate and scared. My first order of business was to meet up with Shell from Things I Can't Say and grab a taxi over to the Opryland Hotel. Would she like me? What if I say something ridiculous? Am I going to embarrass myself? If you are wondering, Shell is every bit as cute, kind, and honest in person as she is on her blog, and I was worrying needlessly.

Once at the hotel, I quickly met up with some other fabulous bloggers like Ashley from Just Another Mom of 2, Erin Margolin, Liz from a belle, a bean, & a chicago dog, and KLZ from Taming Insanity. Still, that first evening, I was feeling reserved and could barely talk to anyone.

The first full day of the conference I felt an internal turmoil. Why am I here? These people are all talking about how bloggers are pioneers, are courageous, and are changing the world. I did not feel that way about myself.

{Bliss is possible only when we are courageous, telling our stories with our whole heart. ~Brene Brown, opening Keynote Speaker, BlissDom 2011}

Maybe it is because I haven't been honest with myself. I haven't been an open book on my blog. I have felt that there were certain things that I couldn't write about. I have not been myself on my blog; what the heck is that about? If I can't be myself in that space, why did I think I could be myself at a blog conference.

Slowly, I began to open up and start talking, start connecting. I talked about my husband's job and about what binds my family together. And all of a sudden, I felt free. I cut the ties that were binding my hands behind my back.

{Connection gives our lives purpose and meaning. ~Brene Brown}

The second day of the conference was better. I felt real connections being formed. I told stories and laughed with some amazing women. I listened to the closing keynote address by Scott Stratten (AH-Mazing!) and I laughed so hard I cried.

And then, the defining moment of BlissDom happened for me. At the end of Scott's talk, this really loud music started. The organizers were startled and had no idea what was going on. All of a sudden, this big group of attendees at the front of the room got up and started dancing to Miley Cyrus's Party in the USA. I knew immediately what was going on: Flash Mob.

I stood up and started dancing. Liz grabbed me and we ran up and joined the group. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my entire life. I didn't know the steps, I learned them as I went along. I didn't know the other dancers, but I connected with them in something that was bigger than all of us.

I could not believe that I was up there. I laughed and was proud of myself for playing along. I knew I may never have another chance to dance with a flash mob and now I can say that I have done it.

I was brave. I put myself out there. And now I am stronger for it. Going forward I am going to be brave. I am going to put myself out there. And I will be stronger for it. That is my BlissDom take-away.

For a video of me and the BlissDom 2011 Flash Mob, click here. This is not the best video of the whole mob, but the only one where I could see myself. Leave me a comment if you think you can point me out. You can see a better video of the whole mob here.

Organizing and purging feels so good

Last week I came to a very big realization. We are moving in just about four months. Four months?!?! That seems like no time at all. And a fire was suddenly lit under my behind.

I. Must. Organize. Our. Stuff.

I used to consider myself an organized, neat, and tidy person. But after having two kids, I just can't seem to keep up with the clutter. And the...stuff. My upstairs bonus room has become a dumping ground. If I have things that need to get put away, they get dumped up there with an "I'll get to it someday" label.

Someday is here, folks.

I got to work on the mess upstairs first. I sorted clothes that the girls have outgrown in order to determine what should be kept, consigned, or tossed. I separated out all the infant baby toys to be stored. I created piles for baby blankets, swaddlers, and sleep sacks. I purchased some new Tupperware storage containers yesterday and am working on getting all this stuff put away. {Sidenote - I began this task with the idea that I was going to pare down the plethora of little baby girl clothes that we are keeping. I just couldn't do it. There is nothing like being faced with the task of getting rid of baby clothes to make you realize that you, in fact, are not done having kids.}

Next, I turned to Miss H's room, specifically her closet. I pulled about 20 pairs of shoes out of there that aren't anywhere near her size anymore. We organized the toys and books, and what do you know, you can actually see her floor! Lil B's room got a once over as well, but she just doesn't have as much stuff.

On Friday, my Tupperware order arrived so I quickly got to work on my pantry. I knew it was time because whenever I opened the pantry door I was showered with snack boxes and arts and crafts materials raining down on me. I filled three shoebox size containers with crayons, markers, and dot paints. I filed away the completed coloring books and threw away those that were tattered and torn.

After the rest of the pantry had been sorted, purged, and reshelved, I tackled the refrigerator. Not just organizing there, but cleaning and scrubbing the shelves.

Today, while I laid on the couch sick with a cold, my wonderful husband worked on the kitchen some more. And y'all? It shines like the top of the Chrysler Building. He not only cleared the clutter off of our other dumping ground "The Bar Counter" but he also cleaned it.

It is so amazing to me what a clean and organized house will do for a woman's soul. All that junk and gunk was cluttering me up on the inside too, and even though I am sick with literal junk and gunk at the moment, I have a sense of clarity that I have not had in a long time. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

Do you have any dumping grounds in your house? Why don't you set a timer for 15 minutes, go clear it out, and see how you feel? I promise you'll feel better!

Erin

Talk or walk? Which is the right thing?

Yesterday I took the girls to one of our local play centers, which is owned by someone I know. We have been there before and I have always gotten along well with the owners and felt very welcome there. This play center is a new business owned by two young mothers, so I like to go there every once in awhile to support them even though it is a nearly 30 minute drive for me to get there.

I have always had a good experience whenever I have been there in the past, but yesterday was different. There was just a weird vibe going on. The owner was sitting at a table with three other moms talking and gossiping and seeming very exclusionary to the rest of us who were visiting.  Then, the owner started talking about her sister's personal business (read: drama) with all of us. And on top of everything else, she was constantly complaining about having hurt her back that morning. The two times that I had a direct conversation with her, she ended up essentially insulting my intelligence: "That's crazy talk" and "And you told her (Lil' B) that getting up at 5:45am was okay?"

So, I don't know what to do now. This is a woman with whom I have tried to help with the marketing side of her business. I have brainstormed and written press releases for her. I have honestly been a huge advocate of this place, and today I am feeling unwelcome there. I had a pass for 6 visits of play, and that pass was fulfilled yesterday. We are in fact moving in just over four months, so I think we'll just avoid going during the spring.

I feel bad though. I truly want her business to succeed, and I feel like I owe it to her to give her my feedback. But I hate confrontations, and I don't want it to sound like, "You hurt my feelings, so apologize." Don't get me wrong, an apology would be nice, but I am more concerned about the other patrons of this play center feeling the way that I am right now, and not going back.

So, what do you think I should do? Talk or walk?

Erin

Trying something new: Zumba!

For the past couple of weeks, I have been meeting my New Year's goal of working out at the gym at least twice a week. I normally do my standard 30 minutes of cardio on an elliptical machine or treadmill, and then I try to do a 1 hour Body Pump class. If you aren't familiar with it, Body Pump is essentially a 1 hour weight lifting class. You get a weight bar with varying amount of weight on it to match your level of fitness. Basically, I can control the amount of pain that I put myself in and there is no fancy footwork to make me look like an idiot show how uncoordinated I am.

Last week a friend of mine suggested we try a Body Sculpt class. I was a little hesitant because I like to stick with the devil I know. Trying a new class could either be REALLY good or REALLY bad. But, I decided to give it a shot. It was more or less the same as Body Pump, except you use dumbells and resistance bands instead of the big weight bar.

Having tried a new class and liked it, I thought, ooooh, maybe I should try something else new. I have really been interested in trying that Zumba (zoooom-ba) class. Have you heard of it? It's Latin Dance meets Aerobics (neither of which I am very good at). So Saturday morning, I gave it a shot. When I walked in the instructor said, "I hope you're not shy! You can't be shy in this class. If you get lost just march in place, jiggle your hips, and smile!"

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

I was a complete and total disaster.

Well, okay, if I give myself some credit, I did moderately well for the first half of class. But there were a lot of Samba and Mambo dance steps, along with a lot of Hootin' and Hollerin'. Literally, when she pulled out the combination with a "Woot, Holla!" shouted at various points, I thought I am not in Kansas any more! The second half of class, my brain was pumping all available oxygen left in my body to my extremities, so my thought processes and coordination suffered. I was flailing all around like a beached whale (again, literally.) I was shaking and popping and looking like a dang fool.

In my mind I was picturing myself on the stage at the So You Think You Can Dance auditions. Nigel looks up from his desk, takes off his glasses and inquires, "So, you've had No Formal Instruction? I would NEVER have guessed that!"

Was it fun? Yes. Was it hard? Totally. Will I go back? The jury is still out. Will I be busting out some sweet Latin dance moves at Blissdom? Definitely not.

Holla!

Erin

The power of small moments

Yesterday in my Bible study, I read about the power of small things that have big consequences. Our days are a series of small moments, some happy, some frustrating, some sad, some joyful, some just downright depressing. So I started thinking - what are the small moments throughout my day that make me happy?

• Getting up early to take a shower and get dressed - in silence.
• Spending my first few moments awake studying God's Word.
• Good morning hugs and snuggles from my girls.
• Hearing the coffee brew and waiting with anticipation for it to be done. Then, taking the first sip.
• Singing singing along with the radio with Miss H on the way to school.
• Watching the girls talk to and play with each other.
• Discovering that Lil' B knows a new word.
• Reading to my girls and finding that Miss H is reading right along with me.
• Getting Lil' B to eat something new (and full of calories!)
• Connecting with friends on Twitter and Facebook.
• Making new friends on Twitter and discovering new blogs.
• Naptime.
• Being silly and making the girls laugh.
• The moment when my husband comes walking through the door and two little pairs of feet run through the hallway calling, "Daddy! Dada!" Melts my heart every time.
• Toasting Lil' B's sippy cup with my water glass at her insistence, "Cheers!"
• Helping a friend.
• Talking to my sister.
• Relaxing with my husband.
• Bedtime.

Motherhood is full of drudgery: laundry, dishes, diaper changes, cleaning. Oftentimes, I lose sight of the little moments throughout my day that fill my heart with joy. Simply by reflecting on this and identifying some of those moments, I feel renewed and full of love.

What are some of your happy moments? I hope your day is filled with them!

Erin

Stepping (no, leaping) out of my comfort zone

At the end of this month I am preparing to take a huge leap out of my comfort zone. I will be attending Blissdom with a few hundred amazing bloggers. And that is my problem. I do not consider myself amazing. I'm just me and my little blog.

I know that everyone says how fun blogging conferences are and how much you learn and how many great people you get to meet. I am so excited about it and yet, I want to throw up all at the same time. I feel like I am about to go to my first day of school in a brand new town where I only know a couple of people.

So why am I even going? I need a kick in the pants, that's why. I need to get back on my blogging game and I think that attending Blissdom will help light the fire in my belly for blogging again.

I am not an outgoing person. My husband will tell you that I am lying when I say that, but it's true. I have a hard time going up to a random stranger and starting a conversation. So, if you are going to Blissdom and see me walking around by myself, will you please come over and say hi? I promise I won't be a total dork (at first, anyway!)

Erin

Adventures in diaper changes

Do you ever change your kid's diaper and think what in the world did they eat that could make that foulness? I had a diaper mystery this week that I'm sure plenty of other moms out there can relate to, but it totally freaked me out.

Tuesday morning I headed to the gym (YAY!) for my morning workout. Miss H was at school and I dropped Lil' B at the nursery. She was especially unhappy about being left this particular morning, but I let them know where I would be and to come get me if anything happened. After my workout, I picked her up and the babysitter told me that she had changed her diaper. She said, "You might want to check it. I'm not sure if I got it all the way clean. And...it was green."

I took her straight to the locker room to check the diaper, got her cleaned up a bit more and then noticed that her bottom appeared to have been stained green, like with green food coloring. I racked my brain for anything she could have eaten over the past few days that would have had green dye or food coloring in it. Nada. It was so weird.

Fast forward to bathtime. Lil' B is happily playing in the water while I clean up the bathroom. All of a sudden she looks up at me and gives me the dreaded cry, "Poo poos!, Poo poos!" Oh yeah baby, she totally pooed in the bathtub.

And it is green. Like Kermit the Frog green. And I have finally figured out the culprit of the green poo.

Source

Yes, my kid is the kid who eats play-doh. Gross amounts of play-doh, apparently, as evidenced by the amount of green poo in my bathtub. How in the world could she have eaten that much? Was there a play-doh buffet at the nursery at church on Sunday? Literally, the amount of play-doh that I saw was enough to fill her entire mouth, plus whatever was in the diaper change in the morning. I can just picture her stealing a jar of play-doh and hiding in the corner eating away at it. Yuck!

Getting inside the mind of a three year old

My dear sweet three (and three quarters!) year old loves Christmas. She carries the spirit of Christmas around with her wherever she goes. Over the last month, she has begged to listen to "her" Christmas CD in the car and to watch Christmas specials on ABC Family every night.

Christmas morning was spectacular. She was so excited that Santa came and brought her just what she always wanted. We basked in the post-Christmas glow for a week, and then yesterday my husband and I told her that it was time to take down the tree.

And she bawled. "But I don't want to put it awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!" Big fat tears ran down her little face. I could hardly take it. She fought me as I tried to put her nativity set in its box, crying all the while.

Mr. Rose finally took her back to our bedroom to have a chat. When they came out, she was fine. What in the world could he have said to her? "She thought we were taking Christmas away, and that it was over forever." Poor girl, she thought we were never going to have Christmas again!

Today she mentioned that it was nice to have our house "regular" again. But is she still singing Christmas carols? Yes, ma'am!

How did your kids react to taking the Christmas decorations down? I'd love to hear!